Valley Forge Volunteer Fire Company

Foursome Finishes at 10-under to Win Tournament
by Jeff Walton 
5/9/2008 

The day was Saturday May 3rd, 2008, Cool and cloudy. 9 a.m. The grass still wet as the morning dew did not dissipate.  Four golfers approached the first tee of Pickering.  It was going to be an uphill battle from the get-go, only because hole number one is straight uphill.   Their favorite Billy Baroos were pulled, their gloves tightened, they were ready for action.   Meanwhile the regiments behind them were checking their supplies. 
Driver?  Check.
Nine iron? Check
3,4, and 5? Check
Sand wedge?  Check
Golf shoes? Check
Balls?  Check
Exploding golf balls? Check
Tees?  Check
Naked lady tees? Um no.
Scorecard?  Check
And most important, beer? Check
More beer? Check
Ice? Check
Are you sure there is enough beer? Check
Ready? Check.
Does it look like rain?
I don't think the heavy stuff's gonna come down for quite a while, in their best Carl Spackler impersonation. 
Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers, they're gonna lock me up and throw away the key.
Bark like a dog.
Just be the ball Danny.
That's a peach, hon.
And so it began, but to their defensive it's very tough not to quote the single best golf movie of all time while paying the game.

The first foursome was already away deep into the fairway.  The next four waited on deck like parachute troopers in the back of the plane.  Then one by one, like clockwork or a well oiled machine the rest of the foursomes, 18 in all, approached their first uphill battle of the day.  Some did it with flare, grace, and bravery; others did it with hooks, slices, killing a few worms, and never once touching the fairway and that was their story.  A Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac... It's in the hole! It's in the hole! It's in the hole!...No No No Owen, it's in the woods.  No No No it's in the pond, Owen.  No No No Owen over there, across the road, way over there, by 29. Speaking of lost golf balls, a sad note to this tale was among the 72 golfers there were a total of 453 golf balls that were sacrificed all on the name of fun.  Please bow your heads in a moment of silence each time you pass Pickering Valley Golf Course located on Whitehorse Road, just a few miles west of Valley Forge.  The good news was that this number was down by 28 compared to last year totals.

So the moral of this story, who needs to be Tiger Woods when John Daley is way more fun?  And fun is what everybody had, that and on their death beds they will receive total consciousness, so they got that going for them, gunga, gunga-galunga.  Oh and the team that had something going for them was the team with the best eraser who turned in a scorecard of 10 under par (62 being the final tally) in the best of ball tournament.  That team was none other than Dennis Koppen, Bryan Hooper, Scott Gillespie and team captain Rick Beittel who played a nearly flawless match to take home the first place trophies and bragging rights for the whole year.  Yeah it's always the case isn't it - the team with the CEO, your boss, the pro, or the chief, always wins.  But as the late Judge Smails once said...

It's easy to grin
When your ship comes in
And you've got the stock market beat.
But the man worthwhile,
Is the man who can smile,
When his shorts are too tight in the seat

The 17th annual Valley Forge Volunteer Fire Company's Golf Tournament went off without a Baby Ruth in the pool all thanks to the hardworking volunteers that helped organized the event.  They couldn't have done it without you and trust me there is no way they could have for a flute without holes, is not a flute, a donut without a hole, is a Danish, and a golf tournament without volunteers is just a few golfers looking for a tee time. 

The fire company would like to extend a special thank you to Quaker Funds, Inc for their donations as well as to all of our GOLD Sponsors including :

Though we are unable to publish all of the photos from the outing, here are just a few random shots...  
Click on the images to enlarge.